Within My Universe - Leslin's Blog Journey

SUCCESS AND FAILURE There are certain times In each of our lives When anything we venture into Just disappears into the blue; When all our sweat and toil Is simply destined to be foiled; When even our best endeavour Is acknowledged by none whomsoever. It hurts to not be appreciated; It hurts to have our aspirations deflated; To see people ignore your virtues And jump at the slightest excuse To point out our imperfection; To leave us in utter dejection; The look of defeat in our eyes Brings an apparent glow in theirs. We learn the hard way That effort is never lauded; Only success is of significance No matter how that success has been achieved; This world is not a place for a dreamer Or so it seems to me; It is for the ruthless competitor; Someone I don't think I can ever be. -Leslin Sushma D'souza

Do feelings even matter? In this era of internet and smartphones Where relationships begin with a like on a picture And end with the blocking of a profile Does fondness matter? Where emotions are considered a joke Where tears are considered a sign of weakness The mark of an attention seeker; Just worthless drops lost from our soul; Do tears matter? Does attachment matter? Attachment causes misery It's the source of all hurt and pain Affection only makes you feel inadequate Do sentiments ever matter? Gone are the days Where we waited days on end For a word from that special someone; A little hi brought tears of joy to our eyes We live in times Where relationships end with a one line text Is life that simple? What is the way to be happy And never get hurt? Will we ever have an answer? -Leslin Sushma D'souza

My mother taught me To be strong in the face of adversity My mother taught me To face all my problems with a smile My mother taught me How to survive in this cruel world My mother taught me How to not let myself be taken for granted My mother taught me What true happiness is all about My mother taught me How to find joy and laughter in little things. My mother taught me How to be a WOMAN My mother taught me How to be ME. LOVE YOU MOM, More than words can say. Love you mom, Although I know it is something I never say. Happy Mother's Day To my mom and all the amazing mothers out there. It's your day, not just today But every day. 💖

When the going gets tough, How do you convince yourself to get going; How do you tell yourself that you are tough, strong; How do you not let yourself just crumble under pressure and stress????? How do you prepare for the difficult times That lie ahead How do you make yourself realise That you can get through this; That this too, shall pass? That you will emerge even stronger? That this is, but, a mere hurdle To reach your journey of success? That all it takes Is just a bold step ahead? How? How? How?

I am in the bus on my way to God's own country, Kerala, as I pen this down. It's 1:00 a.m ., a fact I realised just now while looking at my phone clock. Sleep, amusingly, loves playing hide and seek with me when I travel, hence, while watching the trees (and buildings) pass by and thinking I should have probably been an owl 🦉, I thought of writing (typing?) down a few thoughts. The original destination that had been selected for the trip was Delhi, अपनी दिल्ली... But plans have a habit of not working out at times, and given that I live in Mangalore, we finally decided to travel slightly closer to home this time, and thus Kerala was decided upon. You'll have to wait a bit longer, Delhi... Kerala has always been on my list of travel destinations; however, for some reason or the other, this is my very first trip there. I somehow used to end up on a trip to a totally different destination every time.. Oh well, better late...

The events and happenings of the past two months have made me realise something; you can have the whole world vying for your attention, you can have tons of guys waiting to try and charm you, to win your trust; to have you for themselves; you can be among a crowd of even a thousand people who do their best to keep you entertained nonstop. However, you will still only feel nothing but lonely, sad and abandoned if the one person who really matters is no longer in your life. Have him near you and you feel you can conquer the world. Even the biggest hurdle seems trivial if he is by your side. But once circumstances take him away from you and once you are forced to part ways, nothing will ever be the same again. You will finally realise what it feels like to feel alone even among a crowd. 

It is right now 1 a.m. and I am in the bus, on the way back home from a whirlwind trip of sorts to Hyderabad.  There are people snoring all around me  but being the insomniac that I am (and given the fact that I hardly get any sleep while travelling in overnight buses), I am wide awake, hearing songs on my dear cell phone (hurrah for technology!). The fact that the bus I am in has a charging port that actually works for a change is only inspiring my sleeplessness. So I finally thought I would jot down a few lines in my blog after what seems like ages. I love going on trips and visiting new places. Sadly, though, working in an industry that gives you just a one weekly off and not many holidays doesn't really give me the opportunity to travel often. This time, however, I was determined to make some time for myself for a change. I finally picked up the courage and got leave for two days; adding in a Sunday meant I'd have a three day trip (yayyy)! The next question was, whe...